Far Ahead
Posted on February 5, 2010 by 
This was an emotionally difficult conference! I’m referring to the Desiring God Conference for Pastors, which I attended in the arctic north a.k.a. Minneapolis, Minnesota. It was emotionally difficult because of the onslaught of feelings I had to sift through and sort out, which was compounded by the near zero temperature a Florida boy shouldn’t have to endure. If your wondering why I would be struggling so deeply than you may not have been at the congregational meeting on Sunday night. In the meeting I announced that I would be ending my pastoral ministry here at OGC in June. I love this church! I love the people at this church! I love my life here in Orlando! This is my dream job! But God has placed a burden on my heart that I can no longer ignore; words that I can scarcely believe; a calling I would be unfaithful not to follow. So, the emotional uproar in my heart is crying out for rest and relief; calm and comfort. Crying out for a word from the Lord! And just when I was beginning to think God was not hearing my heart’s cry, Bob Blincoe quoted these words from a familiar voice, Dawson Trotman. The moment they were uttered, the earthquake stopped quivering, the tsunami waves receded, the hurricane faded to a gentle breeze. God’s favor coated my soul like the sweetest chocolate upon a farm-fresh, ripened strawberry. Hear the modern sage whisper these words to your uncertain soul. “If you cannot see very far ahead, go as far as you can see.”
Earthy, average, common, basic, plain, run of the mill, but timely and instantly applicably good news of faith and what it means to follow the scant trail of God’s mysterious will one cautious step at a time. Right now I can’t see very far ahead but I can see that God Himself is a few steps ahead of me on the trail. And now I’m supposed to follow the cloud by day and the fire by night until I get to the calm and rest of the mildly certain.
If you are on the same faint trail as I am current walking on, than lets trudge ahead together. Let’s keep our eyes on the author and the finisher of our faith, Christ Jesus! Let’s shod our feet with the good news that He who began a good work in us with be faithful to complete it! Let’s brandish the sword and shield and fight one more day and make it to the pillow as faithful warrior servants! Let’s fear God and curse at the storm! Let’s cling to hope, grasp for faith and bleed joy no matter what’s around the corner or over the hill! Join me on this impossible mission. The mission of walking into the unknown and waiting for the next trail marker of God’s will for us.
Clay
Feb 05, 2010
Thanks brother for being so open and sharing your struggle. I love what you said, “So, the emotional uproar in my heart is crying out for rest and relief; calm and comfort. Crying out for a word from the Lord!…The moment they were uttered, the earthquake stopped quivering, the tsunami waves receded, the hurricane faded to a gentle breeze. God’s favor coated my soul like the sweetest chocolate upon a farm-fresh, ripened strawberry.” I too have had this same experience but it was before I was saved. I was going through an extremely difficult divorce and I was distressed and in much turmoil and someone suggested that I pray to God and ask Him for peace. I didn’t know if God was real or not but there was nothing to lose so I did pray to Him and He showed Himself to me by answering my prayer and His peace flowed over me from the top of my head to the soles of my feet, like a sweet summer rain shower. I knew right then and there that there was a God and He did care for me. I was saved a couple of years later but it was so easy to believe because God had already shown Himself to me. I praise Him for being ever faithful and present! We do not serve a God who is absent and preoccupied with other things!
Eph. 3: 1-10 – Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will, to the praise of His glorious grace, with which He has blessed us in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of His will, according to His purpose, which He set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in Him, things in heaven and things on earth.
Feb 05, 2010
It was great to spend time with you in Minneapolis, brother, and to get to know you a bit. I know this is a tough time; you’ll be in my prayers. Peace to you and your family!
Feb 05, 2010
Thanks for sharing your heart, dear fellow-worker in the kingdom. I hurt to watch you battle but rejoiced to see you come through on Wednesday. You will be missed, but God has a plan. Thanks for your vulnerable post.
Feb 05, 2010
You’ve been such a gift to us, brother.
Feb 10, 2010
Thanks for this, Clay! And thanks for being what you are for our church. You certainly will be missed. Nicole and I were given much courage by your post, and are fighting to “bleed joy” no matter what’s around the corner. Love you, brother.